Lots of laws are deemed “unfair†(usually by the people caught breaking them). However, some laws go beyond “unfair” to flat out “bizarre”—bizarre because of the punishment stipulated, bizarre because of the principals underlying the law, or bizarre because they’re just really bizarre. Or just dumb.
While we could make an entire list out of any one state’s stupid laws, we decided to share the wealth and give you, dear reader, an American tour or bizarre laws. Get excited.
9. Colorado
Colorado water laws prohibit the use of rain barrels or any methods to catch rain for use. They claim the rain has already been legally allocated to the state and individual may not capture and use water to which he/she does not have a right.
Rain water belongs to the state. And clouds belong to the county, dammit! Rainbows, however, are owned by the city manager.
8. Connecticut
A person who commits any unnatural and lascivious act with another person commits a misdemeanor of the second degree, punishable as provided in [section]. It is illegal for unmarried couples to commit lewd acts and live together
Yikes. I wonder when the last time someone got prosecuted for living with their girlfriend or boyfriend was? I bet they’re probably not at the top of the pecking order in prison.
7. North Carolina
The number of sessions of bingo conducted or sponsored by an exempt organization shall be limited to two sessions per week and such sessions must not exceed a period of five hours each per session. No two sessions of bingo shall be held within a 48 hour period of time. No more than two sessions of bingo shall be operated or conducted in any one building, hall or structure during any one calendar week and if two sessions are held, they must be held by the same exempt organization.
This is why old people never retire to North Carolina. They go to Florida, which is often referred to as “the Deadwood of bingo.†No rules. Dozens of games per week, often lasting 10 hours per game. It’s anarchy.
6. Vermont
42 cyclists who rode through the city naked in 2009 broke no laws, as there exist no laws banning nudity in public. It IS illegal to disrobe in public, but seeing as how the cyclists took their clothes off before venturing outside, they broke no laws.
It’s a good thing, too. Children can handle seeing naked people, it’s the act of watching them take their clothes off that will scare them for life.
5. Texas
It was only a matter of time before Texas popped up on this list.
No religious test shall ever be required as a qualification to any office, or public trust, in this State; nor shall any one be excluded from holding office on account of his religious sentiments, provided he acknowledge the existence of a Supreme Being.
You don’t have to prove you’re religious in order to take office in Texas, as that would be unconstitutional. Instead, all you have to do is acknowledge the “existence of a Supreme Being,†and you’re well on your way. I wonder if Omar from The Wire counts as a “Supreme Being.â€
4. Utah
Oh, Utah. Your clean-living extends even to instances of state-wide emergencies.
A person may not sell, offer to sell, or otherwise furnishor supply any alcoholic product in an area during a period of emergency proclaimed by the governor to exist in the area.
What if the emergency is that you’re out of beer? What then Utah? You’ve really painted yourself into a corner with this one. Conversely, I think Utah should get a law on the books that, during an emergency, someone is REQUIRED to sell alcohol.
3. Indiana (pending)
Hoping to make everyone’s life a little easier, except those tasked with finding the circumference, area, or volume of anything circular, the state congress of Indiana included in a bill a stipulation that pi is actually equal to 3.
Was proposed in the 1897 session of the Indiana General Assembly. Engrossed Bill No. 246. The bill was passed in the house of representatives, but it was indefinitely postponed in the Senate. That status remains today.
So, to be fair, it has only made it halfway through ratification, much to the chagrin of Indiana middle-school students.
On a related note, I hereby decree that “0†is actually “4.â€
2. Ohio
No person may be arrested on the Forth of July. Or a Sunday for that matter.
No person shall be arrested during a sitting of the senate or house of representatives, within the hall where such session is being held, or in any court of justice, during the sitting of such court, or on Sunday, or on the fourth day of July.
Oh, man. I’m gonna commit so many crimes after church now. Everything from embezzlement to jaywalking to assault with a deadly weapon. Sunday funday!
1. West Virginia
You can get fined $20 for fornication or adultery.
If any person commit adultery or fornication, he shall be guilty of a misdemeanor, and, upon conviction, shall be fined not less than twenty dollars.
Here’s a $100. That should cover me for the next six months or so.
It’s wrong to laugh, though. $20 is a lot of money to people in West Virginia.
